A year ago I started this blog and no one read it. I wanted to be a voice for women who aren't supermodels but had super personalities and a take on everything. Today, people read my blog but I am sadly, not the voice of a generation. I think Barack Obama or Kanye took that title. I've learned alot though, some of it useless, some of it kind of awesome. Many of an adventure I have shared on this blog about my life as a fat and fabulous woman. I would like to share the BIG things (pun originally not intended but then I liked it so now it IS intended) I learned this year.
Maybe I am fat on purpose. Lets face it. Skinny women have it easy. When I was only a little overweight or even downright thin, things came to me without effort. Customer service was better when I was petite and I always seemed to have an extra hand when I needed it. That was 2007. In 2009-2010, the tables were turned so fast my head is still spinning. I get raised eyebrows at everything I do from purchasing a bra (isn't that band size a little small for your mammoth self?) to ordering a pretzel (like you need carbs, fatty!). The judgmental retail folk all have that look on their faces that reads, "WHO do you think you are, fatso"? When I was thinner, not only did I take it for granted, but I didn't treat big people respectfully enough. Not only that, but I didn't need to be extra friendly and good spirited because I was pretty and people sought me out. Being on the flip side, I realize that so many prejudices exist still and it's something we ALL need to work on. And yes, part of me hopes this curse is broken with this kinder, gentler me that developed. Despite learning to accept my size and being compassionate, I still want to be thin again.
The other big thing I learned was humility. I thought all I had to do was make enough money and I could have whatever my heart desired. Yes, it's true you have to earn what you have, but it's not just about making more money. It's about being able to manage what you do have and plan for even the worst of disasters when they come. It's about starting over again and again... and again... Because life sometimes has many "resets" and you just need to be able to take whatever life throws at you. So it's the 5th time in your adult life you have to redesign your entire life? Join the club! I moved to Houston and switched from apartment to apartment just to end up back in VA, sharing a tiny apartment with my husband and brother in law. The slice of Humble Pie I ate that day was HUGE. (Pun again intended)
The last thing I learned was family. With all the deaths (the first year anniversary for two major ones in fact) we had last year, it's important to make more time for loved ones and work less. And if you cannot work less, find little bits of quality time. You can't get the lost moments back because you had a TPS report and your boss thinks you should work later each day. (Um, yeeeeaaaaahhhhh those TPS reports..) Advocate for a better work-life balance. Who knows? You might start a trend.
Anyways... Enough mushy stuff. I learned some valuable lessons I can pray on and reflect on. Who hasn't? Do I think I am special or something?
Actually I do. But it's not because of the after-school special lessons I learned. It's because I discovered Nutella tastes great on EVERYTHING.
Don't roll your eyes. I'm like a river, only deep in sporadic places.