So, I am looking for part time writing work. You know, the old, "trying to cash in on what you love" tactic. I went against my usual advice and hopped onto Craigslist. Because I am just asking for it... Really, I am. Who really gets a good, part time writing gig from Craigslist and actually gets paid for it? Exactly. (But, I did find some excellent leads I can contribute to that might benefit me in the future. Exposure, Exposure, Exposure)
After looking through your basic "scam" ads that you can "work from home making $10,000 a month", I found something quite entertaining. Here's the advertisement.
Just signed up on a dating site but I don't have the resources to invest a lot of energy into writing girls. The 'virtual flirting' is a fine art. Can you get results? I want to hire someone who can be my assistant in getting responses from select girls. I can take it from there. I'm an attractive 29 year old entrepreneur with a very intense lifestyle. I have no issues getting dates, approaching girls, making friends, or keeping someone interested; I am not a social retard... I just lack the resources to actively pursue and date.
The ideal situation is one where you are working a few hours a week and setting up 3-5 dates a week. I can pay per introduction, but we can discuss compensation. Write me about yourself and why you think you'd be a good fit. I will give you access to my profile and you can initiate contact with girls that meet my criteria.
I am also in need of a personal assistant that can help me book my travels and plan my life. If you excel at this position there may be some stuff down the road :)
Oh yes, he did. Why is it "RAPIST" was the first thing that popped into my head? Clearly, this is a joke or the worst ad ever. Because I am nice, I offered some advice.
Okay so I laughed a little about this one. If this isn’t a joke, you need to better format your ad. Right now, telling people you are going to allow them access to your profile, is BAD. You’ll get psychos..Or you are one. Also, telling the person you’re a hot 29 year old who is an “entrepreneur” screams, “this is a personal ad”! (It also screams you are a broke, ugly dude, possibly a rapist) Also, if you want true quality in the personality and intelligence categories, you cannot open with your hotness/money. Only the cheap trashy ones fall for that. AND…. They are usually crazy. I write. I’m good at any writing. I can draw people in on the most boring of topics (yours included). So as a courtesy, I re-wrote your craigslist ad:
"Busy, professional male requires writer to eloquently convey personality traits and screen potential dates on a personal dating site. Need someone who is a good judge of character and a talented writer. You need to be able to accurately write “as me” and set up meetings with qualified candidates. While I can very easily do this myself, the time commitment and screening process is too much for me to juggle with my demanding career. Also, would consider a freelance administrative assistant in the future to plan travel, work on important documents and provide organizational services. Please keep that in mind as a possible future task, if you are interested."
That doesn’t sound like a joke or like you want to stalk and rape someone.
Of course I knew that he:
A) Probably won't pay someone to do this.
B) Is probably a dumb, broke guy using this to score a date.
C) Possibly is a rapist looking to meet up with someone.
I was validated GREATLY when I received this in response:
Thanks for re-writing my post. Send me your resume and a headshot if you have one :)
HELL NO. But it's nice to be right, rapist.